Principal and seans old school

• She's so fat, that you can't see her legs. She looks like someone that's  just gliding around.
• She most likely broke her legs and gravy spilled out.
• If she could eve lose weight, she would have to go skydiving naked so that the wind could tear off the excess skin.
• If she could ever jump up, she would either get stuck or come back down and pound the entire world. (year long aftershocks)
•  She has a face made for radio.